Recounting the Journey

Num 33:7-31         1/4/2018

As the book of Numbers begins to wind down, the writer chronicles the various stops on the exodus journey. Several stops are not mentioned anywhere else in the scriptures.

Power of Past Narrative

They are words on the page to us: a list of waypoints. But Moses wrote down the words. For him, each name was loaded with meaning.

Memories. Past successes and past failures; they are preserved by this process. Because they are written down, they exist as claims in history.

My Turn in History

The essence of history is evidence – recorded testimony – interpreted. In law, everyone senses that testimony is weightier than the things we say when we aren’t so careful – when we know that we’re not being recorded – when there’s no downside to gossip and speculation. In those moments, we only say what we are sure of.

In a lonely fog, it seems I’m only failure. Gratitude is gone. I can’t recall a single success. I feel the oppression of my own inadequacy and God seems nowhere near.

I read an old letter – or two. I feel the beads of a rosary in my pocket. I talk to a friend. I reflect.

The historical reality is different. Not a fog. The evidence and the testimony point to a mix. Yes, some failure.

But also some success.

I have followed. And it has cost me something to follow. In hindsight, I see the benefit. I wouldn’t do differently. I couldn’t not follow.

And so my line forms. My story, small as it may be, offers a quiet testimony. It’s been a sometimes lonely walk combined with the goodness of God. And with this I take my place in our common legacy and heritage. It is a contribution. I am enough.

“…In fact, I do not even judge myself.” 1 Cor 4:3

 

Rebuilding East of Jordan

Num 32:33-33:6         1/3/2018

The Gadites, Reubenites and some members of the half-tribe of Manasseh received their portion from the captured territories east of the Jordan. Once Moses had given them the land, they began the process of occupying and rebuilding the villages and cities that had been destroyed.

The plan was to give the time necessary to rebuild the fortified cities and the sheepfolds. This way, the families and livestock would be protected while the warriors fought with the other tribes in the Promised Land.

Build the Infrastructure

Core infrastructure is the stuff that supports our most primary needs. Infrastructure includes stuff like houses and buildings for shelter from weather, and protection from wild animals and raiders. It also includes access to the materials necessary for life and for the functioning of the community.

Build Your Day in order to Support Your Purpose

I have needs.

I have material needs. I have psychological and social needs. I have spiritual needs.

I have assets.

My chief asset is time. Through it, all of my needs will be met – or not. In order to make time work, I need to fix hard spots in my schedule. During this time, I do the most important work.

Robert Kiyosaki (financial guru): “Pay yourself first.” He goes on to say: If you pay yourself first you’ll always find a way to pay your obligations – but if you don’t pay yourself first, you end up paying only your obligations and not yourself.

Jesus (Savior of the world): “Seek first the Kingdom of God and all these other things you need will be provided.”

Your greatest need is relationship with God. Your greatest asset is time.

Pray. Pray for yourself first.

“Pray without ceasing” 1 Thess 5:17

Tribal Contract

Num 32:22-32         1/2/2018

Moses brokered the deal between the leaders of Israel who would succeed him and the tribes that wanted to remain east of the Jordan.

The deal was: If the Reubenites, Gadites, and Manassites refused to fight the Canaanites, then all their possessions would forcibly come into the Promised Land, and they would take their portion of the heritage from there.

Moses ensured that if these three tribes attempted to escape dealing with their commitment to God, that they would have to re-engage in a different venue.

Jonah

This is how it works in the spiritual journey.

Jonah attempted to escape God’s will. But in an effort to heal Jonah’s spirit, God used extraordinary circumstances to put Jonah right back in a situation where he had to deal with his own heart issues – his own false understanding of what is good and valuable.

God’s Purpose and My Heart

Likewise, God’s purpose in my life is to get at the heart issues. My mind is full of every sort of false belief concerning what will make me happy. And if I give my mind the opportunity, it will gladly chase after all these things.

It’s just the way we work. We are made to pursue value. It comes naturally. And most people are really good at it.

The real challenge is in understanding what’s really valuable. That’s what God is trying to change in my heart.

My selfish ambition, my pride, my lust are in competition with my gratitude, my relationships, my community and my God. A worthless bauble versus the pearl of great value.

I keep coming back to the same field. But will I ever see what’s really valuable? Because if I do, I will act on it. If I see Him for who He is, I will leave everything to follow.

“When he finds a pearl of great price, he goes and sells all that he has and buys it.” Matt 13:46

Remaining in the Fold

Num 32:11-21         1/1/2018

Reuben and Gad responded to Moses’ concerns by promising to fight alongside the other Israelites until all the Promised Land was secured. Moses accepted this.

It’s the foundational given: Community is the project.

Community is God’s cosmological project.

Moses was a friend of God. He wanted the project to succeed.

Solidarity

Moses could accept the idea of these two tribes keeping the land won from Midian. But he couldn’t accept the idea that the tribes would break solidarity with the other tribes as they entered into the promised land.

Their willingness to fight in the Promised Land until it was all conquered assuaged Moses and kept the faith. Israel was still one nation.

You Don’t Have to Force Control

A priest friend once said, “As a Catholic, my intended purpose isn’t to “impose” but rather to “propose” an alternative way of life.

In all the Authentic Community, I’ve never found a better description of evangelism.

The universal church has this hard won sense of what it takes to enter into authentic community – what it means to be happy and live a satisfying life.

The key to communicating three millennia of wisdom is the utter respect I express for the other person just as I find them. I choose to accept their worldview, their experiences, their culture, and even their obvious failings. This is the hallmark and prerequisite of true love.

Yet in this acceptance, I remain personally committed to a way that leads to life, and community and fellowship with God. From this comes the possibility that the other might be attracted to what I have already been given.

Jesus said to him, “Do not prevent him, for whoever is not against you is for you.” Luke 9:50

Reuben and Gad

Num 31:52-32:10         12/31/2017

The leaders of the tribes of Reuben and Gad approached Moses and the leaders of the community. They liked the land east of the Jordan. “It was good for livestock”, they said. So, they asked to receive the already conquered land of the Midianites as their portion from God – rather than taking their portion with the other tribes in the Promised Land.

Choosing the Good Instead of the Best

So I have to choose: A land flowing with milk and honey which was promised to my ancestors as my special inheritance hundreds of years ago. OR, an already conquered land that’s good for cattle.

It’s like the classic Stanford Marshmallow Experiment in real, historical, life.

“A promised land flowing with milk and honey” or “an already conquered land that’s good for cattle”. Hmmmm???

I know; hindsight is 20/20. But really, it’s hard to understand in the light of history how someone could choose against a portion of a land “flowing with milk and honey”. Promised Land / not promised land. Promised Land / not promised land.

Judas Chose

Judas strikes me as similar. Whatever Judas’ plans were – he didn’t choose what God was offering. He chose his own political version of what God should have been offering. He never cared for Jesus’ message. He recognized the potential of Jesus’ power and hoped to influence it in his own favor.

There’s a downside to the one marshmallow option. Opposing the idea of givenness is the idea that I don’t actually have to accept what’s given. Every child who eats the first marshmallow secretly believes he will still get a second – no matter his lack of temperance.

There is a price for all this. Reuben and Gad became the least integrated and most vulnerable of all the tribes – eventually becoming among the first of the lost tribes. Judas, who was offered the fast track to heaven, chose a hell of unforgiveness and eternal damnation.

A False Choice

It’s not that the tribes or Judas had to make this choice. Following your passion doesn’t mean selfish ambition. Reuben and Gad could have found a good place to raise cattle in a land “flowing with milk and honey”. Judas could have found a place in Jesus’ kingdom – since it was already within him.

My passion in harmony with God’s will: That’s what I was made for.

That’s what we were all made for.

“Now the Spirit explicitly says that in the last times some will turn away from the faith by paying attention to deceitful spirits and demonic instructions” 1Tim 4:1

Victorious Return

Num 31:20-35         12/30/2017

Victorious Israelite soldiers returning from battle against Midian are required to purify themselves and share the spoils of the war with the community. Under the direction of Moses they divided the spoils.

The Privilege of Community

Community is an ultimate value – it is the great cause of creation. Protecting the Authentic Community was a natural priority. It made sense that the booty taken from the Midianites should be sanctified through the rite of purification before it could be brought into the camp.

But the somewhat strange result was 12,000 Israelite fighters waiting an entire week outside the camp before they could make their triumphant return. A week of purification rituals and the anticipation of returning for the soldiers outside the camp. And the excitement of reunification for those inside the camp.

One week of waiting anticipation. The community above the individual. The community was that important.

Ancient Rite of Baptism

Victorious army, waiting outside the camp for purification and full admittance. Like catechumens at Easter vigil, not quite there but soon. Their longing to enter fully into the community nearly realized. The joy of the community to receive them nearly complete.

This process; these rites – a real effect that transcends our understanding. A renewing – a being made new; a narrow way that we could never have made for ourselves. A narrow way that we would never of have thought for ourselves.

For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body, whether Jews or Greeks, slaves or free persons, and we were all given to drink of one Spirit” 1 Cor 12:13

Balaam’s Advice

Num 31:7-19         12/28/2017

Israel prevailed over the Midianites in the war. Much of the Midianite leadership were killed, along with the prophet Balaam son of Beor.

Balaam was working against God’s plan. He had advised the Midianites that the way to destroy the Israelites’ favor with God was to get them to sin. So the Midianites sent women to seduce Israelite men to sin.

God and the Universe

God is a person. This is a fundamental Christian claim – and it makes a difference.

The universe operates on principles. Knowing this makes the things we experience more or less stable and predictable. Stability and predictability are good. Thinking this way also makes the universe manipulable. I can use my knowledge of the principles to manipulate the stuff of the universe to my advantage. This is also good. As humans, we all need to have the power to order our environment. God intended this, and He empowered us to do so.

But a problem comes when we attempt to use our ability to order the universe contrary to what God is trying to accomplish. This frustrates God’s purpose and puts us in a precarious place.

Working Against God

Balaam forgot this. Even though he knew God, he thought he could manipulate God. He thought he could use God’s principles against His purposes.

The goal of freedom is harmony with God. The boundary of my freedom is God’s will. What He has determined must be, will be. I go up against this like a surfer in a hurricane – at my own peril.

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” Matt 18:6

Midianite War

Num 30:11-31:6         12/28/2017

God directed Moses to war against the Midianites. Moses directed that 12,000 men should be drafted for the fight, 1000 from each tribe.

Not Total War

Israel had more than 600,000 men available to fight. 12,000 men was just a little less than 2% of Israel’s total available fighting force. What’s being revealed is that the fight against Midian wasn’t considered a life or death struggle. This was not an existential war. Israel wasn’t fighting for their life as a nation.

Instead, this was a retaliatory strike against local Midianites because the Midianite leaders were deliberately trying to lead Israel away from following God. This was the deliberate Midianite strategy. So God directed Moses to strike.

Life is Rarely Total War

Bad habits, messed-up relationships; the things you’d like to fix in your life – they aren’t total war. Your healing – your sanctification – your being made perfect; all of this involves real fighting. But it’s not total war. It’s not my central purpose.

My purpose is to love God and my neighbor as myself. Perfect virtue without love would be worthless – if it was even possible. So, rooting out the imperfections in my character should be a fraction of my time and effort. The motive for the fight is to get the additional freedom to love God and neighbor better.

Holy doesn’t mean sinless – as in a historical lack of failure. The effort to be blameless without God isn’t rooted in the love of God or of neighbor – but rather in a pride that strives to be accepted by God on my own terms – not His.

If you know that some habit is holding you back from loving God or the people around you, then by all means take some action to get free. But give yourself enough room to recognize that true holiness will never the be the result of your personal, self-made perfection. True holiness is this commitment to God, to love – as He loves.

“…so that you may learn from us not to go beyond what is written, so that none of you will be inflated with pride in favor of one person over against another.” 1 Cor 4:6

On Vows

Num 29:39-30:10         12/27/2017

Moses gave instruction to the leaders of Israel based on the word of God he heard. This particular instruction focused on the nature, process and the moral commitment of vows for both men and women.

A Deep Well

Vowing is such a unique human power. It gives a deep insight into both what it possible with human beings. And also what is good.

When I make a vow, I create a moral obligation – out of nothing. This is something that only I can do for myself. No one can force it.

This is one reason you have to approach every vow with care.

Presumption of Power

It’s the presumption of power; What if I vow to give money to a person and then get robbed along the way? Unless I have enough extra money, I can’t fulfill my vow. I’ve morally bound myself to do something that’s impossible for me to do.

This is the problem: Making a hasty vow implies my belief that I have power over the future.

Who’s in Control?

Is God in Control? How do I understand the relationship between my day-to-day life and God’s power?

If I’ve come to see that God’s got control, even over the ordinary circumstances of my life, then it’s different. I’m not making a vow if I can’t control the outcome. I’m not setting myself up for that kind of failure.

The whole issue forces this question: What do I have control over? The answer I’ve discovered is just this: My Response.

Everything else is given.

“But I say to you, do not swear at all; not by heaven, for it is God’s throne; nor by the earth, for it is his footstool; nor by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. Do not swear by your head, for you cannot make a single hair white or black. Let your ‘Yes’ mean ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No’ mean ‘No.’ Anything more is from the evil one” Matt 5:34-37

Sukkot

Num 29:22-38         12/26/2017

God described to Moses the sacrificial offerings required for Sukkot – Feast of Booths or Feast of Tabernacles.

The Feast of Tabernacles is also known as the Feast of Ingathering – a harvest festival that lasted an entire week. The feast was intended as a rest and celebration of pure joy in the Lord – A celebration of the goodness and the presence of God.

The seventh month of the Hebrew calendar is a busy time. First the New Year – Rosh Hashana. Then, ten days later, the reconciling of the Day of Atonement – Yom Kippur. Finally, just a couple of days after the atonement, the joyous Feast of Booths – Sukkot.

There is a rightness about celebrating the utter goodness of God in the wake of reconciliation. A somber acknowledgement of brokenness before an utter praising. A penitential rite before a proclaiming of the glory.

Jesus celebrated Sukkot. He shouted out to the people celebrating in the temple. He offered to give living water to anyone who asked. He invoked Ezekiel vision: a tabernacle out of which a river of flowing water would proceed. A fountain that could water the earth. He offered that to everyone who was present. He offered that to you and to me.

That’s what He sees as the possibility of your life – in the ordinary circumstances of your life.

Build a tabernacle. Dwell with Him in celebration.

“Whoever believes in me, as scripture says: ‘Rivers of living water will flow from within him” John 7:38