The Way of Friendship

Synopsis     2Sam 19:25-34     1/22/2019 

As King David returned from his exile in Mahanaim, men and women came to greet him. Meribaal was among the first of these.  

At his departure, Ziba had reported to the king that Meribaal had betrayed him. He reported that Meribaal hoped to be named the new king of the northern tribes. So, David inquired why Meribaal had not joined him during the evacuation and exile. But Meribaal claimed that Ziba, his servant, had tricked him.  

David resolved to split Meribaal’s wealth between them. Both Meribaal and Ziba was then given half.  

Meribaal’s Friendship 

The episode with Meribaal and Ziba had King David rightfully wondering who was truly his friend. For it was clear that Ziba had brought out goods that were critical to David’s successful escape on the night of the evacuation. And Meribaal had not.

But Ziba had a motive – he clearly hoped that David might restore the property that had been conferred to Meribaal. So, vital as it was to David, Ziba’s gift belonged to someone else. And he only gave it in order to gain favor and advantage.  

The Way of Friendship 

Friendship is among the greatest of all goods. So, the way of friendship is an opposite to self-service. In other words, a true friend is prepared to give in support of the good of their friend. And the most important friendships produce the most outrageous giving.   

“No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” John 15:12

King of Mercy

Synopsis     2Sam 19:15-24     1/21/2019 

The northern tribes decided to restore David as king. As they did, David sent messages to the leaders of Judah. His communications were humble and conciliatory. No longer fearing retribution, the leaders of Judah also accepted David as king.  

So, the king began the journey of returning. As he did, the leaders of Judah came to meet him at Gilgal near the Jordan river. In a similar way, many men from the tribe of Benjamin came to greet the returning king.  

First among the Benjamites was Shimei, the man who had cursed and taunted the king as he fled Jerusalem. Although Abishai desired to exact retribution against Shimei, David granted him mercy. He recognized that any act of retribution against those who had rebelled could fracture the healing nation.  

The King and Mercy 

King David put the reconciliation of the nation before the need for justice. This wasn’t an obvious move. Abishai was one of David’s generals. He anticipated that the king would exact vengeance on Shimei. And truthfully, in the absence of any mitigating factors, Shimei’s behavior was clearly criminal and worthy of death in that culture.  

But David had mercy. And the reason he chose mercy was to help heal the nation. And, he chose to heal the nation because that was his calling as king.  

God chose and anointed King David, for the purpose of leading the united nation of Israel. God had mercy on David despite his despicable behavior with Bathsheba and Uriah the Hittite. So, David had mercy on Shimei because mercy was part of God’s plan.  

The King of Mercy 

Mercy is about kingdom building. By the grace of God, I have been shown undeserved mercy. I have been saved. And part of my purpose as a Christ-follower is to introduce this possibility into the lives of others. So, I am called not only to receive mercy in the ordinary circumstances, but to offer it as well.

“For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not from you; it is the gift of God; it is not from works, so no one may boast.” Eph 2:8-9

Legacy Over Feud

Synopsis     2Sam 19:7-14     1/18/2019 

Joab accused David of indifference. The king was so grieved by Absalom’s death that he seemed to care about nothing else. So, Joab pointed out that the soldiers who had defended him were confused and discouraged. And he predicted that unless David stopped grieving and acknowledged the victory, his army was likely to desert in the night. 

Meanwhile, the tribal leaders of Israel decided to restore David to his throne. And David learned of their intention. So first, David messaged the leaders of the tribe of Judah. He challenged them to restore him to the throne of Judah before the northern tribes restored him to his throne in Jerusalem. At the same, he messaged Amasa, who led the army of Israel under Absalom, and offered him Joab’s position as leader of all Israelite forces.  

David’s Family Feud 

Absalom’s rebellion was a family fight. And almost all the major characters were related. What’s more, most of them came from Bethlehem. For example, Absalom was obviously David’s son. But Joab and Abishai were David’s cousins. And Amasa was David’s nephew and Absalom’s cousin.  

The rebellion was in many ways, a family affair. But the Bethlehemite clan fight had polarized all Israel. The nation ground to a halt. Everyone had to choose sides between competing factions from amongst the children of Obed.  

And so, in order to heal the rebellion, David had to heal the damaged relationships within his family.  

Legacy Over Feud 

It’s probably out of fashion to speak in terms of family legacy. Yet, there is an undeniable power in developing the capacity to think in terms of generational impact.  

So, to rightly think in terms of legacy, I have to recognize that my influence in my family won’t end when my children leave for college. And it won’t end when I die. And it won’t end when they lay my bones in the ground. It won’t even end when my name is long forgotten. What I do today will affect the success or failure of people who are not yet conceived for perhaps hundreds of years.  

This is an undeniable fact. My actions will influence future generations within my family.  

So, will I work to deliberately influence my progeny to work for excellence and success with God and man. Or, will I do as I please with my life and hope things work out for me, and for them. 

“but showing love down to the thousandth generation of those who love me and keep my commandments.” Exodus 20:6 

The Fear of Every Parent

Synopsis     2Sam 18:29-19:6     1/17/2019 

Messengers from the battle reported to David. In accordance with Joab’s direction, they told him of the victory in battle. But they also reported that Absalom had been killed.  

David mourned his son’s death. And, he wept loudly while crying out in anguish. So, the whole army heard of David’s lament. And despite their remarkable victory, they felt ashamed and discouraged because of David’s disappointment. 

Finally, Joab went to David as he wept. And he challenged David to stop the lament. What’s more he encouraged David to acknowledge the great victory and the soldiers who had risked everything to support David and his throne.  

Chink in David’s Armor 

David’s lament wasn’t merely about the tragic loss of a beloved son. The reality is that David contented himself with Absalom’s exile for three years. And even after his return, Absalom did not meet with David for another two years.  

Instead, David’s lament was founded in his own feelings of guilt. He was aware that this tragedy began with his own moral failures with Bathsheba. Amnon’s rape of Tamar, Absalom’s vengeful murder of Absalom, and now Absalom’s death in combat were all the result of weaknesses in David’s character. He felt himself responsible for the wrecked lives of three of his children.  

The Fear of Every Parent 

It’s scary to be a parent. Especially when you’ve been doing it long enough to see your bad habits showing up in your children’s behavior. It’s a frustrating source of guilt feelings knowing that my children will struggle with iniquities that I have failed to overcome.  

Yet I have hope. God has redeemed my life – despite my failings. And He has saved me despite my imperfections. Our God is the God of redemption. And so, my hope isn’t in self-perfecting so that I don’t infect my children with my disease. Though that would be nice. Instead, my hope is in redemption.  

More specifically, my hope and prayer is for the redemption of my children. That they might personally know the one true God and His Son, Jesus Christ, for themselves.  

“At the time, all discipline seems a cause not for joy but for pain, yet later it brings the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who are trained by it.” Heb 12:11

A Little Closer to God’s Heart

Synopsis     2Sam 18:20-28     1/16/2019 

Joab knew that David would lament Absalom’s death. So, he refused to allow Ahimaaz to make the report. Instead, he sent a Cushite with the news. However, Ahimaaz continued to press Joab, even after the Cushite departed. So, finally Joab permitted him to go.  

Even though he departed after the Cushite, Ahimaaz arrived to the city first. As he did, he made a partial report to the king. He reported Joab’s victory but denied knowing anything about Absalom.  

Dreading David’s Reaction 

Everyone knew the king’s command was to not kill Absalom. Joab’s decision was unmitigated disobedience. And so, there was a certain dread anticipation of David’s reaction.  

As a result, Joab’s act produced an internal conflict. Ahimaaz was a brave man. During the evacuation of Jerusalem, he risked his life to save David by hiding in a cistern. But he wasn’t brave enough to tell David the full truth. He wasn’t able to tell him that Absalom had been mercilessly killed while helplessly suspended from a tree.  

A Little Closer to God’s Heart 

There is a way of valuing that transcends my personal desires or ambitions. When I find what is intrinsically present and intrinsically valuable in the other person, I get freedom from the limitations of my parochial desires.  

And in that moment, I find myself a little closer to God’s heart. 

“Ever since the creation of the world, his invisible attributes of eternal power and divinity have been able to be understood and perceived in what he has made. As a result, they have no excuse;” Rom 1:20

Lost in Self-Righteousness

Synopsis     2Sam 18:11-19     1/15/2019  

After the rout of the Israelite army, an unnamed soldier approached Joab. With amazement, he reported seeing Absalom suspended by his hair from an oak tree. But Joab was dumbfounded that the soldier had not killed Absalom when he had the chance.  

So, Joab went to the place. And there he struck Absalom. Afterward, he sounded the horn ending the battle. And then, Ahimaaz requested of Joab to serve as a messenger. He wanted to deliver the good news to King David.  

Joab and David 

Joab believed that David’s greatest weakness was his willingness to compromise and conciliate with his enemies. For his part, Joab simply believed in the destruction of enemies. Foreigner or Israelite – it did not matter to him. And so, he actively worked to mitigate what he perceived to be David’s weakness. 

For example, when David struck a deal with Abner, Joab killed Abner. And now, in a similar way, he had killed Absalom despite David’s directive to show mercy. Joab thought he was doing these things for David’s own good. But these acts also served to assure Joab’s continued position as General over all Israelite forces.  

Lost in Self-Righteousness 

We live in a time of contention. And so, I seem too easily to get caught up in self-righteousness. I see the evil in the world. I see the indifference towards God. And I feel with a strange certainty that the world is universally heading for hell. 

Of course, it’s the “feelingness” of it that clues me in. Simply because I feel a certain sense of discouragement, I quietly condemn the very world I live in to hell. And remarkably, I feel fully justified.  

“We’re past evangelization” I tell myself. And I wonder at how deeply disappointed God must be with this world. Never imagining that the Creator of the universe might see His creation in different terms. And, of course, I imagine myself as one of the few standing in the breech. It’s me and Elijah I imagine. I alone have chosen righteousness.  

But in reality, there I am with Joab, unwilling to entertain the redemption of an adversary. 

Thankfully Jesus has a sense of humor.  

When the disciples James and John saw this they asked, “Lord, do you want us to call down fire from heaven to consume them?” Luke 9:54

Wisdom and War

Synopsis     2Sam 18:2-10     1/14/2018 

David prepared for battle against Absalom’s forces. So, he divided his army under three commanders. Initially, his intention was to enter into the battle with his army. However, all his commanders opposed this. So, David relented and agreed to remain in the city. But as he sent the army out, David explicitly directed his commanders to be gentle with Absalom. 

Before long, the two armies met in a forest near Manahiam. And there, David’s forces routed the Israelite army. Tragically, the Israelite army lost twenty thousand men.  

In the course of the route, Absalom encountered forces loyal to David. As he fled the scene, he rode his mule under an oak tree. And there, his thick, long hair caught in the branches. This left him strangely suspended off the ground. 

The soldiers weren’t sure what to do, so they reported the situation to Joab. 

David’s Wisdom 

David was an ultimate warrior. But through many hard experiences, he learned wisdom. So, he divided his troops into three divisions. And he placed a trusted, capable and experienced warrior in charge of each. 

Israel’s military leadership had sided with David. These men were the wisest in military affairsSo, although they were greatly outnumbered; his forces chose to meet the army of Israel in a forest – the most disadvantageous place for a large force to fight.  

And so, in this battle, wisdom was more important than the strength of the force. 

Wisdom and War 

I’m like most people I suppose. I work hard to impose my will on the world around me. Of course, I mean the immediate little world around me. For example, I try to destroy the weeds in my yard by digging them out with a shovel. It actually works. But, it takes a lot of time and a tremendous amount of energy. As a strategy, it has only ever worked when my yard was really small. And, of course, there are better ways to get rid of weeds.  

It’s the same in my moral life. My tendency is to want to fix myself. I want to come to God a finished product. But this isn’t wisdom. At least It’s not the wisdom of God.  

God’s wisdom is that I should love the Lord, my God, with all my heart, and soul and strength. And God’s wisdom is to love my neighbor as myself.  

And therein lies the genius.   

“The quiet words of the wise are better heeded than the shout of a ruler of fools. Wisdom is better than weapons of war, but one bungler destroys much good.” Eccelsiastes 9:17-18

World of Wisdom

Synopsis     2Sam 17:22-18:1     1/11/2019 

Jonathan and Ahimaaz met David at the fords of the Jordan. And they informed David of Absalom’s plans. So, David and his people crossed the Jordan heading east. Soon enough, they arrived at Mahanaim, where David was well received. And, he was given abundant supplies.  From there, David consolidated his forces.  

Meanwhile, Ahithophel reeled with surprise after his counsel was ignored in favor of Hushai. He immediately recognized that Absalom had made a grave tactical error. Accordingly, he realized that the coup would fail. And when it failed, he would be called to account for his treason. So, instead of facing this fate, he left Jerusalem and returned to his home. Once there, he set his accounts in order. Afterward, he hung himself dead. 

Ahithophel and a World of Wisdom 

Ahithophel was thought to be among the wisest men to have ever lived. And yet, he misjudged his situation. And so, he ended his life in hopeless despair.  

World of Wisdom 

For this reason, Ahithophel’s life gives me pause. Where would I be without Christ? Would I want to walk on this earth knowing that I was hopelessly condemned to a meaningless life or a gruesome death? 

But thanks be to Jesus Christ who has saved us from all this despair and taught us to hope in a way that Ahithophel of old could not even imagine.

For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not from you; it is the gift of God; it is not from works, so no one may boast” Eph 8:10

Silent Supporters Everywhere

Synopsis     2Sam 17:15-21     1/10/2019 

Hushai persuaded Absalom to wait before attacking David. He argued against Ahithophel’s request to attack immediately. And once Absalom accepted his counsel, Hushai sent word of the situation to David via Zadok and Abiathar.  

Both high-priests sent their two sons to convey the message. Jonathan and Ahimaaz left Jerusalem with the message. But along the way they were spotted. Absalom’s men searched for them. But a woman hid them in a cistern until the danger passed. And then they continued. 

They met David at the Jordan and gave him Hushai’s message.  

David’s Silent Supporters Everywhere 

Absalom and Ahithophel believed that the nation was committed to make Absalom king.  

But Hushai risked his life to save King David. And both high-priests risked their own lives, and the lives of their first-born sons to save David. Similarly, Jonathan along with Ahimaaz risked their lives to convey the saving message to King David. And a nameless woman in Bahuraim risked her life to save King David. 

The nation wasn’t quite so committed to Absalom as they thought. 

Silent Supporters Everywhere 

Sometimes the way is lonely. You use your energy to enter into God’s will. Yet, sometimes you feel isolated and full of doubt.  

So here an encouragement. God has filled the world with people who know you and who silently want you to be successful. They want to believe that you can overcome. And, they want to believe that it’s possible to overcome. They pray that you will be able to overcome. And when they see this determination in you, they will take unimaginable risks to somehow help you succeed.  

Like angels hidden from sight – they’re there. Waiting for you. 

“For he commands his angels with regard to you, to guard you wherever you go.” Psalm 91:11

Courage and Friendship

Synopsis     2Sam 16:20-17:7     1/8/2019 

Now that he had secured Jerusalem, Absalom sought out Ahithophel’s counsel. He wanted to know what Ahithophel recommended to do next.  

Ahithophel gave a scandalous response. In fact, he encouraged Absalom to defile his father’s bed. This, Ahithophel argued, would make reconciliation impossible.  

So, the recommendation was that Absalom should lay with his father’s concubines. And this Absalom did on the roof of his father’s palace. In this way, all the people of Jerusalem would understand and unite behind Absalom. 

After this, Absalom again inquired of Ahithophel for advice. So, Ahithophel asked permission to personally take twelve thousand soldiers. And with these, he intended to attack David before he had time to find refuge and organize his forces.  

Once again, Absalom liked the plan. However, for confirmation he asked Hushai his opinion. And according to his promise to King David, Hushai disputed with Ahithophel 

The Courage of Hushai 

David had prayed to God that Ahithophel’s wisdom would be frustrated. Hushai was the vessel through which David’s prayer was answered.  

But it required courage and clarity of mind. Hushai risked everything for the sake of his friend.  

Courage and Friendship 

Saint Paul recognized that a man might be willing to die for another good man. Hushai was like that. And if we didn’t know better, we might aspire to have “the courage of Hushai”.  

But Jesus died for me when I was still an adversary to the Way. And so that has become that has become the standard.  

Jesus is the standard. 

“Indeed, only with difficulty does one die for a just person, though perhaps for a good person one might even find courage to die. But God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” Rom 5:7-8